Hope, Judy, and Caitlin on a 25-mile, limited- distance endurance ride in southern New York State. The three young friends trained together for the competition, but during the ride, broken promises led to a hard lesson learned.

Is there a person in your circle of horse friends who knows more about horses than you do? If so, here is a story that teaches a good lesson about the responsibilities of leadership and the bond of trust.

Judy was an underemployed college graduate in her mid-20s. Caitlin was in high school. Despite their nine-year difference in age, they became friends. Horses were their common bond.

Like so many horse friends, the two met at our barn one summer. Caitlin was a novice rider and had just gotten her first horse, a 9-year-old Arabian-Saddlebred cross gelding. Judy had been riding for years. She had a gelding, too, a 13-year-old Arabian-Quarter Horse cross. Their horses were stalled next to each other, and the two young women shared a common tack area. They also shared everything they read on horses, including Caitlin’s copies of The Trail Rider.

Being older with more horse experience, Judy was more than willing to share her horse knowledge with her young friend. She even gave her riding lessons and taught her the basics of riding. Soon, they were trail riding together nearly every day.  Some afternoons, they’d be gone for hours, riding for miles. As the summer progressed, so did Caitlin’s riding ability.

Late that summer, Judy announced that Hope, a 19-year-old friend of hers from work, was bringing her Morgan to the barn. They decided to enter their horses in a 25-mile, limited-distance endurance competition in the mountains, in a nearby state park. Hope’s 18-year-old mare was a flatlander; she was coming to the barn for a month so Judy could help her and her horse to prepare for the event.

When Caitlin caught wind of the competition, she got excited and wanted to enter, too. Vanessa and I listened to the chatter in the barn with interest. Since both Hope and Caitlin were under 21, Judy would have to be responsible for the two younger riders. Both of the younger riders believed Judy would guide them with her competition experience she always talked about.

Caitlin’s mother was concerned as to whether Judy would be willing and able to watch after her daughter and her horse with Hope riding, too. After some talk, Judy convinced her that there’d be no problem. She stressed that she knew the ride terrain, because she’d ridden the same trails at the state park. She added that she’d also ridden with Vanessa and me in competitions and had successfully finished three other limited-distance events on her horse.

Once Vanessa and I offered to transport all three horses to the event and to watch over things, Caitlin was cleared for going.  I thought it would offer us a relaxing weekend in the mountains seeing old friends and watching these three riders in a competition.

The ladies all seemed to get along. They developed a conditioning schedule that they more or less adhered to over the next 30 days. For the first two weekends, all three conditioned together. Then there seemed to be a change. Hope and Caitlin began to ride separately with Judy.

Over dinner one night, Vanessa told me that Caitlin’s gelding looked fit and ready for the ride, but she didn’t think that Hope’s mare was getting enough conditioning. A few days before the ride, Vanessa talked to Judy about the situation. She suggested that they all take it easy on the ride, because of the mare’s condition. “The first loop has some steep and muddy areas,” she advised. “Go slow. You guys have six hours to complete the ride. And remember the motto of endurance, Judy: “To Finish is to Win.”

The morning of the event, the weather was cool but humid. Before the riders left, the head veterinarian cautioned them that rising temperature and the humidity can affect the ability of a horse to cool down. He reminded them that the first loop was 16 miles, and that they could safely take up to 3 hours and 45 minutes to complete the first leg of the event.

“Take advantage of the cool water in the streams,” the vet suggested. “Slow your pace; stop to let your horses drink in the stream, and sponge them off so they don’t get overheated.  We have given you a lot of time to do this ride.”

We watched as Hope and Caitlin followed Judy down the trail. The two novices had all the faith in the world that Judy would take care of them and their mounts. They were going to have a fun day on their first competitive distance ride.

Before we knew it, the lead riders started come back into camp after the first loop. Within a few minutes, we were surprised to see our trio of riders trotting up to the timer. That was an awfully quick loop, Van commented, knowing the conditions.

It became apparent that there was a problem with Hope’s Morgan. “It’s her heart rate,” Hope told Van. “It won’t drop below 84 beats per minute.” Since the Fit to Continue Standard was 64, Hope agreed with the ride vet that she should pull from the ride and cool her horse in an effort to reduce his heart rate.

Van and I recognized the situation, and we started to methodically sponge cold water on the mare. Soon it was time for Judy and Caitlin to leave on the second loop. “Go slow,” we reminded them, “You have plenty of time.” Hope was in tears as her trail partners trotted off to complete the ride.

Our cooling effort worked, and the mare’s heart rate dropped after about 30 minutes. Things calmed down. Back at the stalls, we sat on a bale of hay consoling Hope, who was obviously still upset. We asked her what happened. 

Her eyes welled up with tears as she blurted out her frustrating experience to us. “My horse couldn’t keep up with theirs. When I finally caught up with them at the stream they wouldn’t wait for me. They just took off. I didn’t have time to cool her, and she barely had time to drink. I don’t understand. I thought Judy was supposed to watch out for us.”

All we could do was listen and wonder what on earth Judy was thinking. After Hope calmed down, she became angry with Judy.  She packed up her pickup truck, and placed all her buckets on her front seat leaving no room for Judy to ride back with her. The friendship was fractured.

Caitlin and Judy completed the ride without incident and 45 minutes to spare. Caitlin’s mother gave Judy a ride back to the farm where the horses were unloaded and returned to pasture in silence. No words were spoken between Judy and Hope.

Caitlin and I stood and watched as the two drove their trucks down the farm drive. “Trust is important, Caitlin, particularly when someone is trusted to be a responsible leader on the trail,” I counseled her. “It only takes a single event to break that trust; it isn’t regained easily. Don’t worry, Judy and Hope will start talking sooner or later, but I bet you a dime it’ll be quite a while before they saddle up and ride down the trail together again.”